Things Unsaid
by Toomi
Summary: Episode Tag to season 10's Counterstrike. DanielVala


**Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be unfortunatly...**

_Pairing: D/V_

_Spoilers for season 10's Counterstrike. Previously posted at my livejournal but without a title... got a title, posted here. _

Her words caught him off balance. It had been a tough mission for her, believing Adria and Tomin were dead, letting them go sort of, then to find out they were still alive. Part of him was glad for her sake, part of him had been disappointed. With Adria out of the way the proverbial scales could've been tipped their way a little more.

Once they'd debriefed on the Odyssey after being beamed up just in time he'd chased after her thinking she needed someone to talk to. The almost haunted look in her eyes had given her emotions away despite the fact that he could tell she was doing the best she could to hide it. That and the fact that she really hadn't spoken much throughout the short debriefing.

She'd finally stopped and talked to him but he could tell she wasn't being entirely honest. She was fiddling with her watch continually and even though her words were light her eyes betrayed her and spoke of the pain and sorrow she felt. He let her go, slightly surprised that she had delved that deep into her thoughts and shared them with him.

He'd take a moment when they were back on Earth to talk to her again.

* * *

He wouldn't say she blindsided him with her question about Sha're, but he hadn't expected it. He'd said that he knew how she felt as he meant it and hoped that it would help her open up to him. It had, and she had, but he hadn't thought she'd remember it. He should've known better as he'd known Vala long enough to know that she had an amazing memory despite whatever circumstances they were under.

In all fairness, she hadn't known she was asking about Sha're, but still he had hesitated as the memories had surged forth. He had taken a moment to contemplate on how to answer but still his response had come out a little shorter than he had wanted it to. He had avoided her eyes, not wanting to see the pity he was sure emanated from them but instead got a sad curiosity. Vala asked about the picture he had of her and some part of him wanted desperately to talk about her.

The pain of loosing Sha're was still there, not the sharp ever constant stabbing pain it had been at first, but a dull subdued pain that haunted him at times. He knew that wherever life took him Sha're would still be part of him but as time passed that part became smaller. It had been a long time since anyone had asked him about Sha're. Usually it had been Sam and even then she'd never asked a question, it was just something he would bring up in a conversation without even realising it. He guessed it was several years.

In one way he was glad to share that piece of his history and memories with Vala to show her he trusted her and that she could ask him anything and he would try to respond, but in another way he wished it had never come up. For some reason the thought of Sha're had stuck with him for the rest of the mission.

The words that had stuck him so were the ones that Vala spoke in a deep sorrowful voice before she left the briefing room back at the SGC. After Bra'tac's comment he hadn't thought before responding that her insight was not that of a warrior but that of a mother. After he had excused himself to Bra'tac and Teal'c he had gone after her thinking that this was the moment he should talk to her.

He hadn't found her in any of the usual spots. His office was empty as was her room and both Sam and Cam said that they hadn't seen her. After searching all the rooms on the base that he thought she could possibly be, Siler informed him that she had gone up to the surface with one of the Airman to keep an eye on her.

Daniel frowned as he sprinted towards the still open elevator doors getting there just in time for them to close on him. Swiping his security card several times didn't help speed the elevator back to the level he was on and as he waited he wondered what she was doing.

It wasn't like Vala had never seen their planet before. They'd taken her out on several team nights plus he and Sam had taken her to the surface several times after she had first arrived. This was the first time he could remember that she had gone there alone, without one of SG-1.

Arriving on the surface he didn't need to ask where she was as the few Airmen still around pointed him in the right direction. She was sitting on a patch of grass on the far side of the parking lot that was on a slight rise, the light from the parking lot combining with the rise creating a shadow effect so he could barely see her outline in the dark of the night. He nodded at the Airman who was standing several feet away from her and he left the two alone.

Daniel approached slowly, unsure as to how to break the silence. He watched as her shoulders shook slightly and one hand moved to her face. She was crying and the thought tore him up inside. He coughed slightly not wanting to scare her by walking straight up to her and he wanted her to give him a chance to tell him to leave.

She jumped anyway and this time both hands moved to her face, he assumed to wipe away tears before he saw her. He was standing right behind her but she didn't turn around.

"Daniel, I was just getting some air." She tried to make her voice sound light but he could hear the thickness caused by the tears.

"Vala..."

"It's ok, really. I was coming in right away..."

"We can stay if you want to." He paused slightly and when she didn't respond he continued. "I couldn't find you and when Siler told me where you were I thought I'd come see that you were ok." He cringed as the words came out of his mouth. He knew she wasn't ok despite what she would tell him next.

"Really, Daniel. It's fine." She turned to face him and in the dim light he noted her puffy eyes. He didn't give it a second thought as he sat on the grass beside her, pulling his arms around his knees.

"I'm sure you are but it was a rough mission for you."

"And by that you mean?" He noted her defenses coming up.

"Not only did you think that both Adria and Tomin were dead and have to deal with the emotional stress of that, but then you found out that they were both very much alive..."

"And still planning a mass crusade on this galaxy," Vala finished for Daniel.

"That can't be easy."

"Well, I'm sure a lot of planning goes into such an undertaking."

"Vala." He turned his head to look at her but she still stared straight ahead. She was making light of the situation to change the direction of the conversation but Daniel had come here for a reason.

Instead of pushing for her thoughts he sat back, staring at the sky waiting for her to talk first.

"I can't help thinking of how horrible a mother I am for wanting my own daughter to be dead, for all of this to not be happening. I didn't lie to you on the ship, I was relieved. Thankful that I didn't have to do it, that someone else had done it for me. However, there's still a part of me that thinks I'm her mother, I should be able to stop her." As the quietly spoken words ended in an almost silent sob Daniel couldn't think of where to begin to comfot her. 'It's not your fault' had been said before and while it wasn't her fault it wouldn't console her or bring her any peace of mind.

He did the only thing he could think of and reached one arm around her shoulders, gently pulling her towards him. She fell into his arms with little resistance and his other arm encompassed her as he felt her shake within his embrace.

How long they sat there he had no idea, mere minutes or more, and despite the slight chill in the air he didn't feel cold. Feeling his back complain at the odd angle he was sitting in he moved slightly to make himself a little more comfortable and her head shifted slightly to rest on his chest. Assuming that their body heat was keeping the other warm he decided to stay where they were until she was ready to head in and he gently lowered his chin until it rested on her head, his mind unaware of his hands slowly caressing her back.

He was beginning to doze off himself before he realised that she had fallen asleep in his arms. Gently he tried to stand, contemplating carrying her down to her room as she had looked so exhausted that he hated to wake her. Before he could even get to his feet she was waking up so he walked with her back to the mountain. In the elevator he turned to ask how she was feeling but the forlorn look in her eyes answered his question. When they arrived at her room, he opened the door and turned on the lights. Instantly her hand flew to cover her eyes and he heard her gasp.

"Vala, what's wrong?" He hadn't recognized the late time by the dimness of the lights in the hallway and the light in her room was much brighter than what she'd been exposed to for the last hour or so.

"Headache."

"Want me to get Dr. Lam?"

"No, I just want to sleep."

Daniel turned off the light and led her to her bed, pulling the covers back for her. Intending on leaving at that moment he was slightly surprised when she lay down and rolled over her back to him. Surmising that she had probably been half asleep during their walk back here he turned and gently covered her with the quilt. Again he turned to leave and this time it was the faint sound of his name as she rolled over that caught his attention.

"Daniel."

"Yes?" He crouched down beside her bed not quite able to see her face from the small glint of light coming through the still open door.  
"Thank you."

He felt himself smile as he responded in almost a whisper."That's what we're here for."

Slowly his hand reached out to where she lay and delicately he ran a finger through her hair down to her face and traced her jawline. He heard her breathing change as he stood there, indicating she had fallen asleep and only then did he leave to go try and get some sleep himself.

_AN: Comments? I love to hear 'em!_


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